Homework (Open)

[Kirsten Luna]

Now she had done it. Kirsten had gotten the quiet and distant guy from a minute before to scream right back at her. What was she doing? Getting pissed at someone she barely knew. It was likely all the emotions she had bottled up from her parents push and prodding her to be the best at everything. To favor one parent more than the other. The pencil that had fallen from his hand landed at her feet and her eyes glanced down at it. The slam from the book against the pavement caused her to jump, screeching softly under her breath.

“What’s wrong with me? Nothing, forgive me attempting to give you some advice to get over that people problem you have, because you know what? One day you’re going to come across someone unlike me who doesn’t listen and gets close to you.” Standing her ground, she noticed how Chris took a step closer, but didn’t even bother thinking about it. It was stupid to be getting this angry at some guy, but it wasn’t because he wouldn’t get close to the horse. It was that he wouldn’t even try to face his fears. Over thinking something gave it life and made it worse then it probably was. Granted she had no idea what Chris could have been through so maybe her argument was completely flawed.

The finger pointed at her didn’t lessen Kirsten’s anger. Her hand shot out and slapped it down, not caring that he’d told her that he didn’t like being too close to anyone. “Well, I guess you were wrong.” The image of her parents finally demanding a divorce flashed in her mind. Was she going as crazy as her parents? That was a sobering moment to say the least. Taking a step back from Chris, tears began to build in her eyes.

“Chris…I’m…” Her voice cracked as she hiccupped while taking another step back. This was so stupid and pointless. The one chance she had to make a friend or some familiar face she could relate to in a crowd and it was gone. Biting down hard on her lower lip, Kirsten turned her back to Chris trying to not have another melt down. “…Sorry.” Rubbing at her eyes, she refused to let one tear drop and hit the pavement.

[chris]

The moment her hand touched his, Chris drew back his arm, raised his hand. He was about ready to strike her without even realizing in that instant what he was about to do when she took a step away.

Chris really didn't know what he would have done if she hadn't, and he wasn't keen on thinking about it. He hated the thought of him doing the things he had done to some completely innocent people in the past. He could avoid confined places most of the time, keep his door unlocked, but people were the thing he had no control over. Once they intruded into his personal space he just lost control. Kirsten had stepped back just at the right instance, before Chris lost himself.

He slumped back down and looked up at her back that was now turned to him. Whatever had come over her, she hadn't meant it. She had lashed out at him for some reason of her own, just as he sometimes lashed out at people for his own reasons no one else could understand.

"It's okay," he heard himself say and he looked down, running a hand through his unruly mop of hair. It wasn't really okay, not when the girl was close to tears. He could hear that much in her voice. And he had brought it about, or maybe she had made him bring it about, but that didn't matter. He never wanted to harm anyone, physically or emotionally.

"You know what a phobia is?" he asked, keeping his eyes firmly on the ground and away from whatever damage he might have caused to her. Talking about his own problems was so damn selfish, but he wanted her to understand. How could one face a fear that was so completely irrational that it took over everything? It was a well-meant advice, but Chris just didn't know how to make it work.

[Kirsten Luna]

The fear hung in Kirsten’s eyes when she’d knocked Chris’s hand away only for him to pull it back as if into a fist. She wasn’t stupid and knew it was going to hurt but at least it would be in her back and not her face so to be blinded temporally. Experience taught her that being punched hurt no matter where it went, but the face was the worst in her opinion. Her hands covered her face, bracing herself for the moment the pain would set in. It never came. That didn’t stop her heart beat from trying to create a new speed record for the younger person to die of a heart attack.

Glancing back with her glossy tear filled eyes; Kirsten blinked and rubbed the liquid from her eyes. A heavy blush returned to her face as the embarrassment set in. How stupid could she be to snap at him over something that was clearly out of his reach? She knew nothing about his past that would be the factor to cause this type of reaction from any person. The urge to turn tail and make it for the cabins and lock the door until she was allowed to leave was a temptation.

His voice didn’t ease the guilt she felt for taking out any anger she had on her parents at him. Kirsten’s arms wrapped around her stomach while chewing on her lower lip as her mind tossed and turned. Maybe it was just the competitive side of her coming out. Or maybe she was trying too hard to keep people at a distance and her heart and mind were fighting against each other. With her back to him, she didn’t seem him fall back down to sit on the steps. Her thoughts kept repeating what had just happened. Maybe she was bi-polar. Her mother was, why not her?

“Yes.” That sweetness from earlier resurfaced as she calmed down, but remained standing with her back to Chris. A phobia…was that what he had? A phobia of people touching him? That brought up a whole mess load of new thoughts and images into Kirsten’s mind that she could have lived without. As much as she wanted to face him, she was terrified that the tears would start back up after she’d suppressed them back down. It felt disrespectful to talk to someone with her back to them, but for both their sakes that’s how it was going to have to stay.

[chris]

Now that he had started to talk about it, he would have to tell her more, Chris felt. Leaving her with just a hint wouldn’t help her understand. Looking up he discovered that Kirsten had her back on him and he couldn’t blame her. His behavior hadn’t been friendly at all, just a moment ago. It was pretty amazing that she hadn’t run away after he had almost hit her.

Chris looked down again, but now a trace of a smile played around the corners of his mouth, despite the topic he was about to talk on. “Claustrophobia,” he said, his voice somewhat strained. “Small rooms, locked rooms, elevators. Can’t stand them.”

The latter was quite the understatement, but Chris just wanted Kirsten to understand his condition a bit better, not give her his medical history – or remind himself more than necessary of past panic attacks.

“But it’s also a problem when someone gets too close… gets into my personal space. When that happens…” He paused, shook his head to himself. “When that happens I really have to get them away, whatever it takes. Happens before I know what I’m doing usually. ”

Chris looked gave a small, humorless laughter while he looked up again. “And now they want me to work with horses. Couldn’t they have found something just a little bit smaller?”

[Kirsten Luna]

Taking deep calming breaths, Kirsten counted back from ten. When that only scratched the surface of the peace she needed to feel she repeated the process but from twenty this time. Her fingers curled around her forearms as she hugged herself tight as if blocking out the world to set her mind at ease. Slowly but surely the angry that had over ridded that trigger to keep herself in check vanished from her eyes leaving her face relaxed with no red coloring in her cheeks. Feeling sort of confident she could manage her own aggressing, Kirsten turned back around and faced Chris, but took another step back just in case he tried to point that finger in her face again. It had to be one of her biggest pet peeves when someone jabbed their finger at her as if she was a puppy to be scolded for peeing where it shouldn’t have.

That was a very good excuse to not want anyone touching them. But as much as Kirsten believed Chris, it didn’t add up to why he would have been sent here for it. Weren’t there other places that specialized in just that? What were his parents or legal guardians hoping to achieve? But she listened closely to what he had to say, nodding at the appropriate moments. Whatever had happened to him must have been pretty terrible to have left this kind of impression on the guy. Her eyes glanced over his face and up and down him trying to figure out what was running through his mind. The smirk and sarcastic laughter in his voice weren’t helping the mixed signals she’d been getting.

Licking her lips, Kirsten swallowed the lump that had formed in her throat hoping that what she had to say next wouldn’t cause him to freak out. As she spoke, her voice came out gentle and almost at a whisper. “Maybe…they can start you out slow. Like have you just watch the horses for awhile before taking a single step closer every day.” It was a simple suggestion and it wouldn’t have some as a shock if she found out that was exactly the councilors and instructors planned to do. It only made sense to build up his numbness to how large some of the horses were. “I’m sure they’ll give you one of the smaller ones to work with, that might help as well.” The shire horse towered over nearly every student and Kirsten prayed that wasn’t the one given to Chris unless the camp was ready to have him go into an episode to take it out on the animal.

[chris]

Chris listened carefully to everything she said, wondering what was going through her mind. That she had taken another step back had made him fear that she would leave, and he didn't want that. He wanted her to stay at least long enough to offer more of an apology and not just an explanation.

"Yeah, maybe that'll work." Chris wasn't very certain and it showed in his voice. "They tried some step-by-step things on me to help me stand smaller rooms. Did help a little bit."

As he thought about it, his smile turned more genuine. With a horse, and an instructor around to control the beast, he could really take it one step at a time - literally. That would be a lot better than being around people who could bump into him in the street any moment, or crowded around him when standing in line at the supermarket or the cinema. Not that he went to the cinema any longer for precisely that reason, and shopping in a busy supermarket was simply out of the question these days. It made his whole life so damn inconvenient, after all, he had always loved going to the movies, and now he just couldn't any more. At least here those wouldn't be problems. Willow Brooke provided most of the things he needed, so he had little shopping to do, and Brooke Haven was such a small town that he had to wonder if there even was a cinema or any other place that could get crowded.

"Good thing about all this is that I can spend some time out in the pastures. I'd rather be on a beach, or riding my jet ski, but the pastures still beat being stuck in a school building all day."

Chris looked into her eyes and his smile widened. He could bet she would agree with at least the last part. She didn't strike him as a bookish type or a nerd at first glance, so she was likely to appreciate the short school hours too.

"I am really really sorry I came down so hard on you, Kirsten. Maybe... maybe we can take a look at the horses together?" Maybe he could make a friend after all, now that the storm had passed. He could only hope and pray, but that she was still there and talked with him had to be a good sign. And from some of what she had said earlier it sounded like she knew at least a little bit about horses. certainly more than he did, which wasn't terribly difficult. Getting to know someone who knew about riding sure wouldn't hurt.

[Kirsten Luna]

The uncertainty didn’t escape Kirsten’s notice as she chewed on her lower lip. Thinking through her words before blurting them out was a definite must if she wanted to keep Chris around as a friend. The odds of her making another one weren’t in her favor with her many mood swings. “Can’t hurt too much if they take it very slow with you.”

A fresh blush swam under her cheeks at the smile that was flashed at her from him. There wasn’t anything fake about it, for Kirsten knew a fake smile when it was in her face. More than one occasion there had been one on her own lips to fight off the questions at home. Everything seemed to vanish whenever Kirsten slapped a smile on her cheeks whenever present with a fight at home or in school. “I’m guessing it’s not such a bad idea after all, huh?” Her eyes had fallen to her shoes while she kicked at the gravel that covered the pavement. The pebbles skipped over each other to vanish into the grass on the side. Bending over, she picked up the pen that had been flown down from Chris’s book. “Um…” Handing it back to him didn’t seem like the brightest idea.

Laughing, she nodded about being in the pastures was better than being in school. “Anything beats being in a classroom.” Chris had a jet ski? That was news, but very cool in Kirsten’s mind. She’d never gotten around to doing too many adventures things outside of horse competitions. “If you dislike school so much, why were you working on work then?” Her head nodded to the textbook that lay untouched, which reminded her of the pen in her hand. Glancing down at it, then up at him, she smiled a bit more. “Catch.” Doing an underhand throw to him, it was a simple and slow throw so it wouldn’t come unprepared to Chris.

“Don’t worry about. I kind of snapped right back at you. It wasn’t fair of me to freak on you over something like this.” Shaking her head, the smile stayed on her face as her eyes stared right back into his. “I’d like that a lot. Promise not to freak out on you again.” It was going to take some time to control her anger that lashed out more frequently at everyone around her lately. It was probably from being sent away to the middle of nowhere without a single friend or familiar surroundings. Having someone around like Chris to keep her mind focused would help that line of sanity holding for a few more months.

[chris]

Chris was mighty surprised when he saw her blush. That didn't happen often when he talked to a girl, and on Kirsten it looked... cute was the word that swam into his mind eventually. Not that she didn't look good without that blush, but he thought it looked nice on her, natural, a little girlish. He really had to wonder why she was at Willow Brooke, but knew better than to ask. Aside from being a bit temperamental she seemed perfectly normal to him.

"Thanks." He caught the pencil she had tossed him and put it down on the stair by his side. "Got to do it sometime, and it's not like I completely dislike school. Only that there's some things I like a lot more."

He nodded at her promise and returned her look. "Okay," he simply said. He wasn't the type to hold grudges for long and they had just been of to a rocky start. As far as Chris was concerned things like that just happened sometimes. It wasn't the end of the world, and they could still build a friendship over time, now that she knew where he was coming from.

"I'd like to finish this chapter first, now that I got started on it, if that's okay with you?" He tapped the pencil against his book, then gestured with it to where Kirsten had initially sat. "And you can sit down, Kirsten. You don't have to keep that much distance." Chris tilted his head in the direction indicated, for extra emphasis.

[Kirsten Luna]

The blush continued to sit on her cheeks for awhile as her heart pounded in her chest while her hand reached up and ran through her hair, pulling out a small snag in the golden twisting curls. Even with the sun not fully out the hair seemed to shine on its own as she fiddled with the tresses. There was a debate going on in her mind about telling Chris why she was there. She really had no obligation to tell him, but he had given her a little insight to his life. Wasn’t it fair to open just a crack to him? Placing her hand at her side, Kirsten swayed from one foot to the other before opening her mouth to speak. “Umm…I…” Where did she start? Just telling what had happened or give him the back story? No, just the facts were best. “I was arrested for drug procession at school.” It might have seemed kind of random for her to say it, but it did ease her shoulders down a notch and allowed her to relax. Laughing bitterly, Kirsten shook her head. “I’d never got any before and I didn’t get to try them before I was caught for simple possession. Stupid right?” It sounded pretty pathetic to Kirsten and didn’t doubt that her story was boring compare to others in Willow Brooke.

“Anytime.” Kirsten smiled as the writing utensil was caught by Chris. “I could live without it. I think basic math and knowing how to read and writing is ever going to come in handy for me later in life.” Her hand reached up and slid the backpack of her shoulder and dropped it back on the ground at the base of the stairs. It echoed a soft thump before flopping over on its side. Her confidence had been shaken with the small argument they’d just had and the fist that had been raised at Kirsten. It wouldn’t take long for her to get over it, it was partly her fault to begin with.

“Yeah, go for it.” Smiling at him, the blush finally gone before she laughed slightly as how far she’d managed to get from Chris. “Sorry, kind of got jumpy about the raised fist.” But as she spoke, Kirsten returned to her place on the steps but turned so she was sitting sideways on the steps to face him. Her arms wrapped around her legs to hold them close to her chest while her chin rested on her knees. “Take your time.” Taking a small cat nap didn’t sound like a half bad idea right then as her eyelids dipped down slightly, but not enough for her to fully go to sleep.

[chris]

Chris picked up his pencil and tried to concentrate on his textbook, but found it difficult to focus after what Kirsten had just told him. At least now he knew why she was here. It couldn't have been easy for her to tell him about the drugs, that much he thought he could tell from her voice and body language. And yet the question remained in his mind if she had told him the full truth. Would a real junkie claim that she had never even used the stuff and just had bad luck being caught before she could ever use it?

Looking at her again he realized that he wanted to trust her. Chris was a trusting soul to begin with, and he found it easy to tell himself that any real junkie would have practiced a lie like that a few times by telling it over and over again. It would have come out smoother, easier. Those thoughts didn't happen on any conscious level, but once his subconscious had arrived at that conclusion he felt more relaxed and started to believe she had, indeed, told him the truth about herself.

Chris pasted another post-it into his book and scribbled some notes on it, for a short while turning his full attention to his book. But after he had gone through another page, he said, "guess you just had bad luck." He didn't look up from his book as he added, "or maybe good luck."

With that he looked to her and gnawed on his lower lip for a second. It really wasn't his place to give anyone advice on how they should live their life, but her laughter had been so bitter, so not fitting her, that he had felt the need growing within him to say something on the subject, on the off chance that he could make her feel a little better.

"I don't think it's fair that you got sent here, in the middle of nowhere, if you never even used the stuff, but maybe that's for the best. Dunno what you had, and I don't need to know, but I know some drugs can be pretty dangerous. Best to keep your distance, if you ask me."

Only after the words had come out of his mouth did he realize that Kirsten could be from a place just as small as Brooke Haven, just as isolated. He could only hope and pray that she didn't - or if she did, would at least not take his 'middle of nowhere' comment the wrong way.

[Kirsten Luna]

With Chris getting back to his text book, Kirsten sighed softly and shut her eyes for a short break to herself. The past couple of nights sleep hadn’t come easy to her with the changes going on around her. In fact it had been years since she’d really had a good night’s sleep. Probably even before her parents separated. Every event made her wonder what would have happened if she’d sucked it up and stuck it out going back and forth between her parents. What if Carmel hadn’t taken that dive during the race? Would she have made it through the race in the top three? There were so many possibilities for her future and it seemed it all had come undone with a single bag of drugs stashed in her pocket.

It never occurred to her that Chris might think that she was lying about the drugs. There wasn’t much of a suspicious bone in her body outside of a competition. Or maybe the idea had poked its head in her thoughts. It all seemed too perfect for someone to have some drugs on them, go to use them, and get caught before taking a single smoke or hit. But it had gone done just like that. Kirsten’s timing was legendary for being terrible as her brothers constantly reminded her. The new string of events only hit that thought back home.

“It is kind of funny the way my luck goes to end me up here. I suppose by now I might be hooked to some substance that won’t feel as good the second or third time around.” Kirsten wasn’t stupid in not knowing why someone becomes addicted to a drug. Each time the addict was looking for that hit they’d gotten the first time they’d ever taken a drug. Opening her eyes, the large emerald grey orbs stared over at Chris to see him still absorbed in the notes on the page. She kind of envied that sort of dedication to school work, which always bored her after a half hour of staring at the same page over and over.

“This place is no Florida, but I suppose it’s better than nothing. Kind of too quiet for my taste, but I can live with all the horses around.” A smile returned to Kirsten’s face at the memories of the beach and the warm ocean water licking at her toes in the middle of winter. It was always hot and beautiful to go on the beach no matter the season. Her arms released her legs to allow them to stretch out across the step.

[chris]

"Florida?" Chris repeated after her, his eyes widening in a surprise he made no effort to hide. "No kidding?"

The thought that he might have offended her with his earlier words was readily replaced with curiosity in an instant. But yes, he realized, she wasn't kidding. He had heard the accent earlier, quite similar to his own when it showed at moments when he got passionate about something. He would have realized it sooner if they hadn't been in the middle of arguing at the time.

"What are the odds of that," he mused, "both of us getting shipped to the same place in Montana and running into each other here?"

He chuckled and shook his head. He didn't expect an answer, as the odds would be impossible to figure out, even for a genius, but he figured they weren't all that high. The universe worked in funny ways sometimes, leading him to an encounter with someone from his home state as the first person here he had exchanged more than a few words with.

But he hadn't told Kirsten that yet. "I'm from Pensacola. Where are you from?" he asked, his curiosity still very much evident in his voice, and he actually leaned a little closer to her. That closed the distance by only a few inches, and kept the distance between them still well within his comfort zone, but it happened rarely enough with him these days.

[Kirsten Luna]

The blush returned at the outburst from Chris across Kirsten’s cheeks, possibly even redder than before. “Um, yes and no I’m not kidding.” Kirsten reached up and twirled a strand of hair around her index finger to try and ignore how hot her face felt. If anything she needed some sort of distraction. She hadn’t blushed this much in so long it was very nerve rattling. Why was Chris so surprised by her being from Florida? It wasn’t that big of a deal right? It was just one state out of the 50 in the United States. What connection had he made in those moments before?

Confusion fell over the blush at Chris very odd statement. Her mind wasn’t quite following his line of logic. But the delight in his eyes at some new information only baffled her more. The southern accent he’d pulled out of nowhere during the fight didn’t register in her mind since she’d been getting angry herself. When Kirsten got pissed off there wasn’t much that did click in her mind until awhile after the fight. “What are you talking about? I’m not quite following Chris.” Chewing on her lower lip, she started to fear he might have lost his mind.

Her mouth fell open slight in an ‘O’ seeing what he had gotten at. Florida. They were both from Florida. Now it made sense. “Panama City.” Noticing how he leaned closer to her, Kirsten resisted the urge to do the same since Chris was making a big move to get closer, still keeping his personal bubble but it was a step up none the less. “Dang, I visited Pensacola a few years back for a week in the summer.” Partially to stock up on horse supplies but also to see some old racing friends.

[chris]

Chris's eyes widened considerably when she mentioned Panama City. Not only were they both from Florida, but also both from the panhandle. "Hah. We are almost next-door neighbors then."

He leaned back and rested an elbow on the step above him. "Well, not exactly," he admitted, smiling widely, "but close enough in my book." All things considered, Panama City and Pensacola were pretty close. Close enough that he wasn't surprised Kirsten had actually been to Pensacola.

"I never visited Panama, but I passed through it with my dad a year or so ago. The coast looked pretty nice to me."

Back then a man who lived close to Panama had run into some serious problems with his car, and as he had been in a hurry he had left it at Chris's father's garage to get it fixed and then delivered to him, while he took the next train home. Chris had helped his dad with fixing the car as much as he could, and had been rewarded by being taken along on the field trip.

Thinking about it brought back some sweet memories of a rolled-down car window and smelling the salty sea breeze while listening to music on the radio and just chatting with his dad about everything and nothing while they cruised down the highway. Those had been good times - times almost forgotten in the fears and anxieties that had ruled his life for the last six months.

"Well, if we ever get back home - and you ever come to Pensacola again - I can show you all the nicest beaches."

[Kirsten Luna]

“Almost.” Kirsten nodded while smiling at Chris. She was happy to just be past the argument from minutes ago and on a lighter subject. As the blush faded, she leaned slightly forward to him without thinking, not too close to invade his space. “Small world for the both of us to end up out here.” Tilting her head to the side, her hair fell over one shoulder while her eyes watched Chris lean back on the step above him. He looked fairly comfortable and she honestly wished he wasn’t so afraid of people getting into his personal space. Back home, she would have attempted some sort of flirting with him, but flirting was so much each when a person was closer than three steps apart.

The wind tugged at Kirsten’s hair, throwing it back over her shoulder to brush against her back. “Well it wasn’t like we were going to have been from the small neighborhood. Those odds are so much higher than what they already are.” The smile that sat on Chris’s face was very endearing. It added a certain quality to his face that made any girl want to get closer and know Kirsten knew why he didn’t like people too much and kept them far away. The chances were girls in the south didn’t completely respect that little request she had from earlier. It was a kill joy, but she’d keep her space but it didn’t help she hadn’t had any contact with someone in weeks since avoiding her parents and brothers.

“Really? I might have seen you outside my window.” Laughing, Kirsten winked playfully before leaning back against the wall that blocked off the stairs to the school. Her fingers drummed against her thighs while her mind wondered back to a sing she’d heard just when her alarm had gone off. It was still stuck in her mind. “It’s a pretty nice coast, only wish the water was a little bluer.”

A thoughtful expression clouded over Chris’s eyes and face, telling Kirsten he was in the mist of a flashback or a deep thinking exercise for his textbook reading. Either way, she kept her mouth shut for awhile and stared up at the clouds over head. “I’m sure you’ll get out of here and I’ll hold you to that.”